la douleur exquise

I've sat staring at this empty screen for 20 minutes. Large cappuccino. Room fan on full. A unknown song plays (fall to water washed away, all that water washed away). Someone else's things surround me and this room is not mine. My hair is blonde now and I've put on a few pounds, my yellow …

Burning Man

I burned a man in a wheelbarrow at the bottom of my garden as flames scorched and blackened he smiled he smiled the same as he did the day we met he smiled the same as he did the day we first made love yeah, he smiled just the same no pain did cross his …

Janus

Autumn is breaking down While I'm still broken It all dies in the winter Yet I am already dead As my tears water my hopeful bones Nothing grows inside my head And I know That leaves turn golden And snow is always pure But my exposed and broken ribcage Is still holding all my hurt …

77 days

Absent for 77 days. Damn that's a long time! I wish I had a better excuse than the ones I'm about to make but quite frankly, I don't. Talk about writers block...I guess it wasn't a case of not having anything to say but yet having too much to say. So much so that it …

Hidden Messages

To my love, Never in a million years did i think I'd meet someone like you. The confidence you've given me and the hope you've shown me is something I can never thank you enough for! One day you'll read this note and i hope it makes you smile. One day soon we will live …

I Wrote A Book (update)

So, it’s happening! My book is becoming a reality. I’m actually going to see my book in print. Don’t get me wrong I still have a lot to do, images to select, edit and place, a few sections to thin down or bulk up but for the most part it is all coming together and …

Delete

Delete One after another and repeat I watched our Christmas disappear first Your birthday vanished soon after With every hit of the button, the knot in my stomach tightened Delete I opened the file, Paris Emotions torn from my mind Faded were your eyes the whole time Gone now though to a place I’ll never …

My Boyfriend Plays Guitar pt2

My boyfriend plays guitar I let him play it when he likes And he knows that when I kiss him I’ll always look him in the eyes And another note my lover I’ll always take you by the face Tell you that you’re beautiful And embrace all your mistakes When you play that sweet guitar …

If I Died

Still, time and space stop If I died, I wouldn’t mind My eyelids drop You’re so warm in my content Fingers locked inside mine I’m in the hoodie you lent Your heart you didn’t lend me That is mine to keep I’ve packed it away nice and neat And Inside the pleats I stored my …

Crying Wolf

Road cones and crying wolf We are driving through the dark Your hands are on the wheel But your teeth surround my heart And I am happy thought I’m crying Tears are pooling in my gut As I feel your eyes upon me Accelerator under foot.